My Everchanging Plot of Life

I've been enjoying the only quiet day I've had for what seems like ages at home, on my own and doing as little as possible, but the fourth big event of the weekend is approaching at a rapid pace. Same principles re: socialising will apply from yesterday, unless it seems reasonable to stay.

Then, home for a re-pack of rucksack, quick tidy up, and setting of alarm for horrible o'clock tomorrow morning.

Probably won't be wandering this way for a few days now...

I was only away for thirty six hours, but it seemed so much longer!

I had three events and related socialising to go to. I managed the events, and after the first bout of socialising where my current opinion of many male clergy was reinforced, I decreed to myself that I was being foolish, and that the next day would involve event attending, and no socialising afterwards. Luckily, the two stars of the events were very understanding of why this was the case, and both said firmly it was more important to them I was at the event itself!!

On the plus side, I got to have a leisurely late lunch, watching the boats and people go by, I got back here about two hours earlier than I might have done, and my sanity is reasonably intact!

It's been a yeucky day. Work-wise, weary me-wise, weather-wise, watering plants... I always knew this was going to be a difficult week, but not this bad. It's been one step forwards, two back, three sideways, and a logistical nightmare.

I may have to opt out of going off as early as I wanted on Friday to catch up on one or two things. Pah.

I'm also not looking forwards to the weekend at all. It's also a logistical nightmare, as well as involving a high level of socialising, and possibly dodging people who will be wanting to talk, with the best of intentions, but I'm worn out with talking and explaining myself...

Then, there's been the interesting conundrum of What To Wear. These are occasions where the decision's been made for me, and I've smugly not had to think about these matters. It was somewhat of a shock to my system when I realised I'd have to put more thought into this than I've been used to for some considerable time.

Anyway, I think I've sorted the problem reasonably satisfactorily and more importantly, in a sensible way so that have new work clothes for next term as well. I have avoided A Proper Dress.

Still, the freneticness slows down by next Friday, and moving into the next phase begins properly.

Watering plants time. Still, the good news about that is I can leave doors open all over the place, to try and create a through draught, to try and cool down. Failing that, maybe standing under the watering can and being watered might help.

Of course, I could have taken up the serious offer of a water pistol fight this evening. I fear the five year old would have won. But, I might have cooled down! However, for some reason, I was on my relatively best behaviour. Odd, that.

Nothing like an honest 16 year old to give one food for thought! He pointed out how annoying I could be when I was being too full of energy and bouncing and he wasn't feeling like being around bouncy, cheerful people! Oops. He is right, though! Not that I'm going to stop being that way, but it's right to remember to tone it down when needs must.

I am well aware that I can be a very over enthusiastic, bouncy, OTT person. I'm also well aware that that's only one side of me, that only comes out when

(a) I think it's needed, or
(b) when I've enough energy stored up for it, or
(c) I have got to get me through something I don't want to do.

or any combination of the above.

So, it's actually not been a side of me that's functioned very well for a few months at all, because I've not had the energy, (as it's going into all kinds of other areas of life) and less of the need. It's taken longer to gear myself into that mode, and longer to recover from it. It's why, ultimately, I do not want to teach, and am actually a poor teacher, despite numerous people trying to talk me into it recently. I work well with children and young people, when I'm trying to teach them something I'm enthusiastic about! Not when I'm trying to teach something with a little voice in the back of my mind saying "Why am I required to teach this?"

Yesterday's tact failure was a result of me trying to be cheerful and enthusiastic, when there wasn't a need for it, and I mis-read the situation. Which is also fairly unusual, given I know the individuals in it quite well now. But, I do accept we are all stressed for different reasons, and I do know it's sortable, so I'm not fretting. (Much!)

I'm also aware I'm trying to be cheerful, and positive, as a way of avoiding all the well-meaning enquiries as to "How I'm doing?". I still can't give any definite answers to questions I know people would like to have answers to... and as soon as I can I will! I'm also keeping on an even keel and trying to keep life as "normal" as possible with those I see on a daily basis. Which is probably where most of my energy for day to day living is going for the immediate future, as it's taking a colossal amount of it not to lose my temper, with several people, on a daily basis right now.

It's all a conundrum. My life is full of them at the moment. But, I'd much rather have the 16 year old honesty (as well as those of my best friends who are fantastic) than some of the other stuff I'm getting, messages through other people, rather than to me directly, pious clap-trap about what God wants, (funny how other people always know that one better...)unsolicited advice about how to go about a number of practical things I already know about.

Mostly, though, I'm just listening to all the unwanted and unnecessary advice, nodding, ummming, and then going my own way, anyway.

Now I look at a map properly, my triangular conundrum is still a triangle, but my placing of various places was a wee bit dire. Especially the one place I want to be in easy reach of.. I think I was so impressed that that is still within easy reach of any of the possible ideas are well worth considering, my mental map of Central England went haywire.

Anyway, it isn't in the middle of the triangle, but just on the outer edge of the shortest side. Illogically I'd mentally misplaced where I currently live! I thought it was further north. Now that's seriously wishful thinking.

However, despite my failings in the Geography department, and the tact department (but there's a lot of stress and unknowns around for the three of us involved in the big tact failure yesterday, it should be fine once Monday is over with) I have achieved success in getting my Facebook chat thingummy to work again department. It's never worked since it had a re-jig, but I've discovered I need to put people into a list. Or several as the case may be. So, I spent a happy half hour creating my lists!

Sometime later today, a benevolent teenager is going to teach me about Sim cards.

I have concluded I definitely need either a new purse, or a new back pack, purely on colour grounds. Or even some differently coloured socks.

Yesterday's interesting sidetrack involved me phoning round, asking plaintively if my purse had been found. Once all answers were in the negative, I began looking in all the unlikely places, and, lo, it was to be found deep in my laundry bag, hiding amongst numerous socks of the same colour, after an hours searching.

This is not the first time such an hour or more has been wasted since my backpack and purse and most of my socks have been the same colour. It's not the first time I've blogged on the phenomenon of the purse hiding with something of the same colour (the computer tower was the last hiding place).

I also appear to have misplaced part of an official garb. I think I know where that is, though!

The answer to my MIA Facebook word games players is, I think, Wimbledon!

An ideal part-time job has just been offered to me! It's in a field I've worked in before, with someone who's worked with me before.

Which would work very well with current part time job I'm hoping to keep, as both are flexible.

Unfortunately, it's about eighty miles away, making a lovely triangular shape on the map with the location of the ideal accommodation offer.

The one place I don't want to be too far away from is slap bang in the middle of the triangle...

Interesting times ahead.

Oh, and I definitely need a new purse, that is not the colour of my backpack. Or the colour of most of my socks.

a second part-time job would have materialised in one of my current work places (to go along with first part-time job) and somewhere to live would have been found near by, or at least on a reasonable bus route. I would know what I was doing in seven weeks time, rather than still not having a clue!

At the moment, the first part of that is really not coming together at all, and the second part is proving trickier than might have been supposed!

So, I've applied for some really interesting sounding jobs that I'm definitely qualified for, and have excellent references to back me up. All still in the general area of current work place.

However, as I hinted, there is a New Idea.

The new idea is an offer of virtually rent-free accommodation - for a year or so, a hundred miles away! Which hasn't got a clear date for moving into... but, that's not a problem.

I am really tempted by the last idea, as there is one bit of me that would love to move somewhere different whilst I get used to various things again, and it's somewhere that is still kind of within my mental map for going to, as it fits my strongest criteria (of being close to friends, and urban). It also means I'd be happy finding any kind of work that pays enough for me to pay bills and eat, and maybe do some other interesting things from time to time, like buy books or go to the occasional concert or cinema trip. Or even go off visiting friends!!

I am, however, surprisingly calm about this state of affairs. Probably because I'm avoiding talking to all the people who are not calm on my behalf, so I'm not being wound up by their anxieties. Probably also because whilst it all seems very chaotic, somehow, it does seem as if it's all going to work out somehow. Though, of course, in that ideal world, one of those lovely full time jobs would be in the vicinity of the accommodation that I like the sound of so much!

But, I can't stop myself listening, and growing more and more appalled...

I'm not a music purist, I've played some lovely arrangements of orchestral stuff at the piano, and have some gorgeous clarinet arrangements of piano music or orchestral pieces, and have even written some simple arrangements of well known tunes when I was teaching piano and clarinet. But, some things are just wrong on anything other than their original instrument, and this is one of them.

Bach's Toccata and Fugue in D minor should be played on the organ, not by an orchestra. I can appreciate it's good, and well done, but It Is Wrong, I tell you.

(And, yes, I am also about to be very perverse here. When Sky did their version in the 1980s, I had a tape of it, played it over and over again and enjoyed it. That is, until I learnt to play it on the organ! I was young, and fickle...)

I'm going to have to get hold of the church keys tomorrow, and go and play it loudly to dislodge this from my head. It seems to have dislodged all the tunes from Les Misérables though!